Brisbane Festival - What's Wrong With Gregor Post?

I stole this image from the Brisbane Festival website.

What's Wrong With Gregor Post? I have no fucking idea - aspergers? ADHD? Too much time on the shrooms? I couldn't really answer the question, but it was pretty solid entertainment for fifty minutes that's crammed full of political in-correctness, and at such a small price you don't really have anything to lose by going to watch it. You're also supporting the Brisbane Festival and local artists. So yaaaay.

What's Wrong With Gregor Post? is a show about the titular character recounting some of his fabulous globe-trotting escapades. Through some tricky conventions and unbelievable stories, aided by some kind of narrator, Post communicates various tales of his travels that are remarkable to the extent that its started to question whether they happened at all. What's Wrong With Gregor Post? is a delicious black comedy that revolves around the power of imagination. Possibly.

I enjoyed it like a movie - it was light, snappy entertainment, but it just didn't manage to immerse me into the dramatic world (or meaning, until after), and I found my mind wandering an awful lot, pondering the mysteries of the universe but primarily reflecting my boring personal life. However, Post's adventures, which are told episodically, have bizarre and unpredictable twists which never fail to entertain. I'm pretty sure other patrons of the show were pissed off since I kept on laughing at pretty much everything, but to be honest any speech that involve the words 'moist' and 'dense' in the same sentence are a fucking win. The script was full of snappy throw-away comments that were hilariously crass and surely would have sent some monocles flying.

The setting and lighting were nice and simple. The set itself was simple, but crammed full of objects including lights, signs and furniture which expanded for Post's adventures which filled and flourished the minimalist stage (the rest you can fill in with your imagination. AHAHAHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAAAA! <- what a pun). The music, which combined lots of pop  music extracts with (what I think was) an original score was utilised really well, setting and assisting the mood in an unobtrusive manner.

I almost liked the Metro Arts theatre, but the fact that we could hear all the music blaring from the coffee shop outside, including 'Lines on Palms' by Josh Pyke, which in turn reminded me of Bree, made me froth wildly with unconditional, incandescent rage.

I made sure to buy Benjamin Coconut-Smashing Schostakowski - I call him that without his knowledge, seeing as he doesn't actually know who I am - a drink afterwards, partly to thank him for the quirky piece he put on for us, but also out of guilt at the fact I rocked up the Metro with Thom and Othelia somewhat inebriated after downing a bunch of beers to obliterate any memories or emotions about my lack of love life (although, writing shit like this all the time, I'm pretty sure people - myself included - agree I do deserve it).

Schostakowski is a talented guy, I really enjoyed What's Wrong With Gregor Post? but I just didn't find it exceptionally thought provoking or ground-breaking. But who the fuck cares - it's got awesome dry humour, it's not prudish and it's inherently entertaining. By the way, this isn't a review, I'm way too drunk for this to be a review. Yay Ben!

Tickets for Benjamin Coconut-Smashing Schostakowski's 'What's Wrong With Gregor Post?' range from $15 to $20, and is showing from 8th to 11th of September, 2011 at Metro Arts Theatre. Book by visiting the Brisbane Festival Website or by calling FoxTix on 1300 111 369 .

BOND Play with their new image

BOND's new image. Note the absence of Haylie Ecker, the addition of Elpseth Hanson (left) and how small Eos' waist is...

In 2004 bond released 'Explosive', a track that rocketed them to world wide fame, and then they disappeared. Emerging seven years later, with a new member, new image, new sound, and a new recording label, bond are attempting with a new Middle-Eastern themed album to win their way back into the music scene. While the 'Play' is mostly a disappointment, there are a few great moments, and seeing as it's a new album from bond it seems like it's worth the investment.

Highlights of the CD include 'Diablo', coined by Magnus Fiennes who wrote their previous hits including 'Shine' and 'Victory'. The piece is a flurry of staccato strings, tedious and spontaneous, with a dark flare - all being accompanied by a rapper who questions prejudice and the fairness of existence and an introduction to the vocals of Eos Charter. They provide a much needed intervention amongst the noise, and her dreamy vocals are hypnotic and entrancing. Cellist Gay-Yee Westerhoff also provides a surprisingly funky tune with the Gypsy influenced 'Beatroot', an energetic dance piece which will make toes tap. Fiennes also produces magic with 'Elysium', a whirlwind sci-fi piece which sounds like a fusion of the Doctor Who theme and Muse's 'Uprising', creating up uplifting ethereal and transportive piece which is nothing short of awesome.

Most of the album is comprised of covers of other material, but some of them are quite good. The Slumdog Millionaire theme tune is here in a glitzy dance version of 'Jai Ho' which has some sweeping moments thanks to the cello and viola chord progressions, and the Black Eyed Pea's 'Pump It' is also included, however it's one of the better numbers on the album as it's adrenaline pumping, catchy, and has a distinct flare of Eastern tonality. The rendition of Bittersweet Symphony under the title 'Last Time' is pleasant, but out of place with the theme of the album, and the piece is just a glorified, souped up version that pales in comparison to other innovative arrangements such as the cover by the Vitamin String Quartet.

'Summer' and 'Winter' are equally out of place, and are equally terrible as bond has started to employ the use of a very tinny/electric string noise which many of their competitors started using over the years. bond already covered segments of Vivaldi's Winter movement in their piece 'Viva!', which could pass as a dance floor anthem, but apparently that wasn't enough because they've covered it again here with 'Winter'. The effort is passable compared to 'Summer', but also comes across as tacky, being drenched in over 9000+ effects. 'Summer' is a bombastic rendition of the second movement of Summer, which clearly tries to emulate the success of Vanessa Mae's 'Storm' - it even has rain and thunder sound effects at the end - and it falls on its face since it's just the original piece, but it's presented as some techno porn with all kinds of effects detracting from the music. There is way too much going on in the backing, and combined with that grating electric string noise it's almost distressing to listen to. The two movements try to fuse the avant-garde with pop music for the masses, but it just ends up feeling contrived.

The rest of the new material is nice, but not especially memorable. 'West With The Night' starts off promisingly with a dark mood before unintentionally morphing into some kind of RPG battle boss music. It's loud and powerful, but not moving or special. 'Apasionada' is essentially a redux of bond's old 'Gypsy Rhapsody', but 'Road to Samarkand' is punchy and distinctly Arabic, with a nice focus on strings with the right amount of percussive instruments backing conjuring up images of the Middle Eastern deserts.

The new mix of 'Victory', that is included as some kind of vague reference to the quartet being re-born and celebrating their tenth anniversary, is a total step backwards. The backing and mixing of this piece sounds dull and lifeless, and topped with the tinny strings this produces a rendition which is totally inferior to the charming original, and is miles behind the dance mix which propelled bond into their initial fame. 

This CD serves as a sort of reboot for bond. 'Play' has too many covers, and most of their new repertoire is not really that memorable. There are a few great tracks that sound perfect amongst bond's greatest tunes, but there are a couple of shockers too, and overall this material is not really up to the standard that bond left behind seven years ago. I'd recommend giving it a listen to, but don't expect it to be as good as their work with 'Shine' and 'Born'.

BOND's new album 'Play', is available in stores and online in Mexico now. Asia and Europe release dates are on September 13th, USA to be announced.